Puppy Promoter Gifts

''Woof, Woof, Woof.' You call that a blog entry?'

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

"I remember a time when not everything was about the puppies."

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

People who let their big dogs run around leash free and then say things like. . .

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

'He followed me home. Can I keep him?'

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

"Then he suggested we go to a leash optional beach."

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

"House training's not so bad - you soon get used to it and, if you play your cards right, you'll get lots of treats."

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

What they're thinking.

'I'm afraid to ask.'

Ventriloquist Speech Therapy.

Preschools for Dogs

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.

'He's got laryngitis. I'll have to speak for him.'

"The circus was good but as 'Jo Jo, the dogged faced attorney', I'm making a killing."

'The man at the shelter promised he doesn't bark at all.'

"And she smells great!"

William felt out of place in the dog obedience school.

"While your resumé said one thing it's come to our attention that labradors actually shed quite a bit."

At a mansion with a doorman a dog and cat have their own little doors with their own little doormen.

"Nobody seconds, now sit down and shut up."

'And this is Mr Blagstock our chief salesman.'

My other dog is a Great Dane.

"I'm the result of a one-night-stand my father had with pea-hen."

"They're so obsessed with that dog that it has its own web-site!"