Pupil Ponderer Gifts

"Take a few minutes to introduce yourself, Ms. Berry. Not that they don't already have you pegged."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

Waiting for Pants

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Thinking and thinking backwards.

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

Psychiatry ward with 'Inhibited' and 'Outgoing' trays.

'The hippiest dryads were often farouche.'

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

'It's a real conundrum. Not sure if I should open it, or beat it.'

'It wasn't easy, but I got you a jury of your peers — six hairdressers, five interior decorators, and a professor of 18th Century poetry.'

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

"Is there a God?"

'That's from the last year the data was available.'

Bizarre sights.

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

An epiphany is the sudden realization of essential meaning. An "explanation point"!

"Turned out he wasn't a miniature."

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

The Big Four debate banking ethics

Left and Right: Please be consistent.

'If we're seedless watermelons, where did I come from?'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

"Hang on - I've forgotten the question!"

"You know what your problem is? You think too much."

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

Quick Crossword.

Psychiatry. Whenever I go on an ego trip, my superego won't let me have any fun.

Well at least we can handle these rocks.

Elevator dilemma.

Man imagines his pregnant partner as an impossible bottle.

"Obviously, somebody screwed up somewhere."