Punny Romantic Pillows

'I just had to come over...You caught my eye.'

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

Sexual chemistry set

Peach flirting with a banana.

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

Rude Snowpeople

"I have such strong feelers for you."

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

Sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm giving my baby a bottle.

'Shuck me.'

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

Happy Hog - Manet

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

'You tell me you're a sexual athlete and your first time at bat you strike out!'

"May we see your kids' menu please?"

"Why would I care if you're not a pure breed? That's a human concern! Sure, I'll go out with you tonight..."

Cupid

"Do you have any marriage bread?"

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

Husband / Wife / On The Side

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

'Smooth move -- Now we're in REAL trouble!'

'Want to come to the Thanksgiving play, Grandma? I have a real meaty part.'

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

"Yes I do like intelligent women - what a stupid question!"

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

"My new boyfriend is a golfer. . .he's very good with his putter!"

"Go ahead and touch my light. It's made of boyfriend material."