Punctuation Minimalist Gifts

e. e. cummings explained. 'It's all fixed, sir, all that is except the shift key.'

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

Punctuation Police

(Camel paintings)

Someone who knows apostrophes

'The Questioner'

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

Dating an English Major

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

"We needn't have a fancy home, just a place to rest when we no longer roam."

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

'Hey...remember T.V.?

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"I've just invented the question mark."

'At least I never have to straighten it out.'

Job Interview Gone Bad.

Ironing Punctuation

Typewriters and Laptops.

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

I think you'll find that I'm easily encouraged. For instance, the fact that the two exclamation points above your head are tempered by one question mark gives me great hope. !?!

'The grammar's awful and the spelling's atrocious - otherwise it's an impressive CV.'

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

I have taken over Sarahs body!

'You've spelt 'C.V.' wrongly.'

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

Tonite: Gala Costume Party. Got your costume for the big party? No, I'll just part my hair on the other side and go as my own reflection.

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

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