Punctuality Puns Pillows

'Sorry, I overwashed.'

Late BroomStick

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

"You keep impeccable time."

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

Man looking at watch while a cuckoo comes out of his head

'Am I the first one here?'

'Sorry I'm late - I couldn't stop doing things with it!'

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

Time Clock

"I'm tardy? Whew! I was afraid I was going to be late for school!"

Deadlines, Inc.

Low self esteem workshop - 'You missed it. It finished two hours ago, you useless pillock.'

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

Your talk of promptness seems to have worked - everybody was out of here by one minute after five.

"You're late."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

'Any chance of getting your alarm clock fixed?

Efficiency Expert: Back at 3:17:03

'It's come to my attention that you're becoming a bit of a clock watcher.'

'Sorry I'm late.'

"How about fashionably never?"

"Sorry! Traffic was awful and also I left really late."

'I'm not late. Everyone learns at their own speed.'

Internal Clocks.

Clock in, Clock out.

'Anyone can get to school on time if he tries hard enough, Eddie.'

'Sorry I'm late. I woke up on my back, and you know how turtles are.'

Husband concerned about being late whilst wife has plastic surgery.

'Sorry I'm late, miss. My alarm clock overslept.'

"Finally! I got all my deliveries done on time! I also put all the oil cans on the oil can shelves! And I actually put batteries in the battery display!"

'That's Watson, away on the stroke of five as usual.'

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, there will be no delays on the subway today."

"I'm sick of hearing about unpredictable time portals and black holes. If you want to work here, you need to show up on time."

'I've invented a device for making people late for work.'