Punctilious Perfectionist Gifts

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Punctuation Police

Someone who knows apostrophes

'The Questioner'

Bullseye!

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

Dating an English Major

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Surreal ale

Ironing Punctuation

Job Interview Gone Bad.

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

'The grammar's awful and the spelling's atrocious - otherwise it's an impressive CV.'

I have taken over Sarahs body!

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

Man looking at watch while a cuckoo comes out of his head

“The two spaces after a period were a dead giveaway.”

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'I can't take all the credit... I used spell-check.'

'Am I the first one here?'

"I was a gainfully employed copy editor. Suddenly, one day, I couldn't tell an em dash from an en dash."

"Well, this might explain all of the recent punctuation errors."

Man kicking Exclamation Mark.

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"