Punch Perfecter Gifts

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

'On second thought, perhaps it would look better if your hand was tucked into your jacket.'

Elevator Pitch

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

Surreal ale

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

'Are you done yet?'

'I'd steer clear of the rum punch.'

'Your proposal sounds interesting. Can you send me a written proposal? I cannot reread a phone call.'

'Apparently, wild hopes and dreams, re-enacted by Barbie and Ken, are no substitute for a solid business plan.'

'Here's where you give me non-comprehending nods of approval.'

The Hockey Puckey

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

Minutes Later The Course Of Comedy Would Be Changed Forever.

"That's two tossed salads, one egg drop soup, and one pulled pork."

Quality Contorl.

"For future security questions, the name of your first pet should include a minimum of eight uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers and special characters."

Personal Cheerleader.

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Boxing Trainer: 'And watch out for this fella. He has a huge Left Hook.'

Ventriloquist's fete

'Yo, Danny! The pitcher's complaining about the crowd noise. Turn it down!'

Attorney Punching Bag

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

I would love to learn Karate, but Dad insists I do Boxing instead: He says I have natural disposition for it...

Certificate for 98.4% accurasy.

"I wrote it, dear...the Great American Password."

Cat boxer

'He has a great left hook,'

'They balked our pitch.'

'Look at it this way...you're like a big pop star! The hits just keep on coming!'

'Yes, that will work as an elevator pitch...if your potential client works in a skyscraper...'

"Nurse, can you send in the interpreter for Senora Delgado?"