Public Restroom Philosopher Pillows

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

"How do you say ‘Where is the bathroom’ in Sanskrit?"

"Because we dismissed his original self-diagnosis, he wants to give us his second opinion."

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

"Hydro density appartus invention? Go away - I'm not disturbing his bath for that!"

"I've been having stomach problems. I sit on the bathroom for 30 minutes in the morning...and a half-hour in the evening."

'I suppose the word 'patient' is used because that's what you have to be!'

'Wow, look at all these prescription drugs that are out of date.' FLUSH 'Happy as clams explained.'

'I take a cold shower every morning... right after my daughters have taken hot ones.'

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

'It's been a rough day, my shirt button fell off, the handle of my brief case came off... I'm too scared to go to the bathroom!'

Vanity artist

"When it takes longer to wash your face, you're getting bald."

'Dr. Bone's first opening for a new patient is 2 months from now. Will that work for you?'

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

Everyone has a good novel inside them.

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

'I. Am. So. Embarrassed! How long have I been sitting across from him with that stuck in my teeth?'

I guess Grandpa was once a wise king, too. He always says he does his best thinking on the throne.

"Do you have any idea who it is you're talking to?"

"I broke off the relationship, then came the endless reminders, the sad letters and emails...It's tough cancelling a subscription."

"I only drink to be sociable. . . if it's any of your business!"

Prehistoric Graffito

"You'll know when I've had enough. You'll have to wipe up the mess."

Round the Clock

A couple with dog look at restroom signs of a man, a woman, and a fire hydrant.

'Ecce homo!'

'Three things I don't think we should talk about ... politics, religion, and everything else!'

If toilets could talk

Nature is not perfect