Public Philosopher Gifts

"What's the furthest away, America or the moon..?"CartoonStock Upload

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I don't like the looks of that!"

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

At This Restaurant, There Are Only Two Dishes on the Menu and They Both Suck

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

The devil you know and his plus one

No Immediate Danger

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

Men gossiping

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

ONE HORSE TOWN

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

'Man. Piltdown Man.'

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

I asked my girlfriend if there was someone else...

Brickie's Mate

The Revolution Will Not Be Organized