Public Opinion Navigator Pillows

"But, what if we're attacked in the press?"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

"Do you have a minute, Bob? I'd like to speak with you about the concept of 'leadership'."

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

"You need to stop taking your work home with you. Take mine instead."

'She finally made employee of the month but she paid the ultimate price.'

"I'm sorry, but you didn't recognize me as the Messiah when I had braces and glasses."

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

'Yes, I occasionally make mistakes but, unlike you, I never have to acknowledge them.'

Others' perceptions (which aren't always true)

Like Minded

"Think about it. Maybe it's a good thing the boss doesn't know your name."

'I need you to be more MORE DECISIVE when agreeing with me.'

Desk of Public Opinion Polls has 'In' box 'Out' box and 'Undecided'.

"So that is unanimous then - nobody has a clue what to do."

Who's In Charge Here?

Confirmation Bias

'For? Against? Undecided? Uniformed? Apathetic? This is one accurate poll!'

'Don't mind me....I'll just sit here while you work on homeland security, unemployment, health care and your many other prbblems!'

"Duct tape fixes leaks in the office, too."

'Yes. No. Sometimes. No. No. Yes. Don't know. Sometimes. Yes. Mo.'

"A word to the wise..or is it a word from the wise? I always get it mixed up."

Business man must jump through hoops to impress his boss.

Election Time

"I'm finally done celebrating the recent election."

JC Yomp & Assocites: Semi-professional SCAPEGOATS...24 hr daily.

'And now, an NBS News Special Investigative Report: Why doesn't President Obama get the respect and support he deserves?'

When you are most likely to be stabbed in the back

"Maybe it's not so good that my mentor is taking me to the mountaintop with him."

Nycole Turmel: I can call Jack anytime for advice!

Keep Calm and Cover Your Ass

'It guides you through the halls of bureaucracy.'