Pub Landlord Pillows

'Look, if the brewery were using genetically modified hops in their beer, don't you think I'd be the first to know about it?'

Landlord checking money, Customer checking ale

'What are you grinning at? It's only 5.30.'

'Whats your poison.'

Hippy Hour: 'Sorry,mate-dyslexic signwriter!'

Pub landlords t-shirt 'GNAT'S'

'It's been taken care of.'

Hamster bartender

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

'I think they go too far sometimes.'

'Have one yourself, landlord - I've just failed my 1000th candidate!'

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

Keep your Slate Clean and Amnesia Away.

Darts team ordering their drinks using notes attached to darts.

"The usual, please."

"How's that pub landlord thing working out?"

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

'No ice.'

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

Best Before 5th Pint.

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Shaken not stirred

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

"I think we may be related!"

Beer Stall

'I know it's gassy...'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."