Home Pub Owner Pillows

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Shaken not stirred

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

City Boy.

Beer Stall

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

'I know it's gassy...'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

Men's fragrances...

The Reaper's Arms

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

"Have you seen my dad?"

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

Infinity Tavern

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."