Psychotherapists Gifts

"It feels like people are always trying to avoid me."

'Right. Making money in the stock market isn't everything... that leaves bonds.'

Santa's chimney climbing is a fixation with mothers womb

"I seem to grasp things with my hands and feet but not with my head."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

Lynching on social media

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'I have this fear of the real world...'

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

Fear/Knowledge

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

Licensed Therapist

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

Thinking Gears

America, are we learning anything?