Psychic Seafarer Gifts

"I think your personal psychic is a waste of money. She promised us a boatload of fish, and I haven't had a nibble all day."

Captain in a storm

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Naval Veterans Drinking at Greenwich Pub

Viking Loch Ness

'There is no point in leaving civilization, because civilization will not leave you.'

Lighthouse Beam.

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

"Awwwk! Mutiny is a go! Pass it on! Awwk!"

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

Thoughtful gifts for that special pirate in your life.

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"International trade"

Walking the Plank.

Solemn Reference is Made to Mr Bunsby

'I told you that parrot didn't know how to navigate.'

'Well, we still think you're a naughty boy, running away to sea like that!'

"Thar be an Hallowe'easter a blowin'."

"My new book will be an epic novel of the sea."

My First Boat

"Whaddya say, Black? We'll plunder the seas together. You scratch my back; I'll scratch yours."

"Too long at sea, I'm afraid."

'I realize you love my boat, but you've been on it for nearly a month now. Do me a favor and go home.'

Captain Thomas Coram.

'The E.S.P. phone: "Hi! I'm on the train."

"The only problem with working for a pirate is that we tend to only sail in the Caribbeans: It gets boring after a while..."

Rob The Grinder admires the Nobby Shropshire One

'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

"That should attract every over 60s cruise ship, in the area."

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

Angry pirate looking at angry parrot (wearing diaper) on his shoulder.

Lighthouse Bulb Replacement

"You look good for your age."