Proud Sibling Pillows

"That's my new baby brother. He's a floor model."

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

At the Museum

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Boy and Bear and Monster

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

Bathroom Fairy

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"Better luck next time, kid."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

'We had him trained to stay off the furniture, right up until we gave up.'

'No, first start the engine, then bark!'

The Charge of the Kids

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

Fade to black...

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

"Congratulations. It's a litter."