Protein Lover Gifts

Low Carb Dieter Birthdays - diving for meat from the pinata.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Steak Ted?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"Rump roast?"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

"How long have you lived in this gym?"

Spontaneous Kombucha

Butcher's shop has 'Cuts of salami' sign: End, Middle, Other End.

Cow of BEEF

Strive to win!

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."

Platter confusion.

"Here's to wellness—women's wellness!"

Would you mind putting the barbecue out?

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

'Nice barbecue, Normy!!'

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'

I don

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

"Oooh... bacon!"

"Hmmm... what would Scooby Doo?"

"Albino broccoli mum!"

'Beef Counselor - mad cow, foot and mouth, diet, nutrition, ethics'

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

'I'd like something with a high amount of vegetable protein, a bit of glucose or dextroe for energy, and some fiber.' 'One peanut butter and jelly on toast.'

A Cow's Last Will and Testament