Property Market Prodigy T-Shirts

'Nah, I don't want to play house. Let's go condo instead.'

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Look, son, real estate."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

Reverse Mortgage.

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

Home Sweet Second Home.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

House hunting is cruel.

Repossessions

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'They're playing house.'

'This is close enough.'

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'