Property Market Prodigy T-Shirts

'Nah, I don't want to play house. Let's go condo instead.'

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Look, son, real estate."

Reverse Mortgage.

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

House hunting is cruel.

'They're playing house.'

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'This is close enough.'

Repossessions

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."