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Snail Homes

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

The stages of gentrification: a guide

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

"Look, son, real estate."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."