Property Law Pundit Pillows

'You, me, them...these days we're all someone's intellectual property.'

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

Mouse real estate!

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"I have always depended on the content of strangers."

An exaggeration of estate agents

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

Jasper Coot: 'Osama shoulda named me to the Supreme Court! I ain't no judge, so I'm qualified! Hell. I ann't even a damn lawyer! But Lord knows, I am judgemental!

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

House hunting is cruel.

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

House for sale, appliances included (in the yard).

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'Bless. Wayne's made his first affordable home sand estate.'

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'My expedition confirmed what we already suspected: Two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered by water, and the rest by real estate!'

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'Like I said - this property is only a stone's throw from the ocean!'

'For sale: Igloo w/attached 2 snowmobile garage.'

Real Estate Crispy Flakes: Location/Location/ Location

'Look, they're slowing down.'

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

"When you pay the rent for your one-room studio, you mustn't think about what you can get for that amount back in Iowa."

Real Estate Life

"Grandma is included in the purchase price."

'Cosy little kitchen, isn't it?'

'We finally got a response to our House For Sale sign. The wind blew it down.'