Property Pundit Pillows

'No, it's not your dream house. It's your wake-up-and-smell-the-coffee house.'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'We finally got a response to our House For Sale sign. The wind blew it down.'

'You won't find a nicer view for the price they're asking!'

Caution- Falling Property Value Next 5 Miles

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'

Signs outside Houses, one reads 'Sold', the other 'Good Riddance'.

'I came up here because the meaning of life is location, location, location.'

'It's the only affordable housing we could afford.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

'...There's been a 20% rise in the length of time our house been on the market'

FSBO Heaven

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'My expedition confirmed what we already suspected: Two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered by water, and the rest by real estate!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'This house was formerly owned by a family who thought they could afford a house like this.'

ACME FINANCIAL ADVISORS, SQUARE ONE, 'We need to relocate - this is a TERRIBLE address.'

'Apparently, Phillips, you want a lawsuit on your hands!'

'If home values keep dropping, I'm planning to upgrade and move into my car.'

"And it comes with free do-it-yourself lawn maintenance."

"On the other hand it does have plenty of cupboard space."

Real Estate News You Can Use: Buy Your Igloo in Summer!"

"Seeing as how you're still undecided, how about I lease your soul with an option to buy?"

Real Estate Life

Real Estate Crispy Flakes: Location/Location/ Location

"That's not damp- it's a water feature."

Coming soon: Compulsory auction because of unpaid mortgage

'No, the house is in perfect condition. It's the bank that's a fixer-upper.'

The first ever house-price bore lived here.

The Movers Strip - Selling houses over the internet

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

'Do you want to put that on the market?'

Child blowing house bubbles.

Passer-by see sign in front of house: Buy one, get one free.