Property Pundits Pillows

"Those days of being able to sell any old c**p have long gone!"

'Look, they're slowing down.'

'We don't think of it as an investment but as a metaphor.'

"That's the trouble with youth today. They expect to move into nice car right away."

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Look, son, real estate."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Reverse Mortgage.

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

Home Sweet Second Home.

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

Beef Stew.

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

House hunting is cruel.

Repossessions

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'This is close enough.'

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."