Property Detectives Gifts

Homeless elderly parents - 'Isn't it nice that our kids are finally on the property ladder?'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"That should read $20.00. I'd make the correction, but I don't want to be accused of price-fixing."

'Well, the rent is a bit more expensive than usual because there are only 1 327 482 other tenants...'

"Now how did she know?"

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

Starter Homes

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

"Obviously the price of this property is a reflection of it`s very desirable location."

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

"It's in move-in condition."

"It's a new rent concept - fifteen minutes for a quarter."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have a bit of trouble with those in the back yard.'

Real Estate Life

"Did I mention it needed a little work?"

Goldfish in Bowl, "And this is the sitting room and the bedroom and the toilet and...."

'I'm sure a little baking soda will freshen it up in here.'

"... And how long have you had this irrational fear that you'll never get a mortgage?"

"Hmmm, didn't I mention it before? Yes, this property neighbours a cat sanctuary..."

"We love the view. It helps to remind us that we're part of a larger community."

Things of the past...

"The price of oil is dropping...so...why has your gas gone up?!"

Gas price rollercoaster.

'That must be the termite inspector.'

'I see you have been mopping the floor while I was out. Are you doing this to be nice or disposing of evidence?' 'Why can't it be both?'

'We may find that there are hidden service charges with this place ...'

House detective.

'Bargain basement sale ... Everything's down but the prices.'

"Well, you did say that you were looking for a detached property."

US Housing Market

For sale

"I love real estate. It's so tangible."

'Some things you just accept when you move to San Andreas.'

"Hang on - I thought you said it was a listed building..!!"

The Property Ladder.