Property Analyst T-Shirts

"Ah yes, 'The Three Little Pigs', a cautionary tale of insufficient real estate market analysis."

Boom & Bust.

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

"Look, son, real estate."

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

Home Sweet Second Home.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

"The government prefers to see it as a flexible, environmentally friendly building option that fits within our current funding projections."

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

Repossessions

'This is close enough.'

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

House hunting is cruel.

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

"And the bathroom has a water view...if you fill the tub."

'I think you'll find it open and spacious!'

"Do you have one with a bigger mud room?"

Now if you're looking for a handy fixer-upper

'I need three estimates before I appoint an estate agent.' - 'Right, £120,000, £130,000 and £140,000.'

Couple wanting to buy the estate agents office.

"Anything in Mr, Rogers' neighborhood?"

"It's a little bit small,but it's got great cross ventilation."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

"We've townsized."