Property Market Analyzer T-Shirts

'Being afraid to buy a house doesn't make you homeophobic.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

'I remember when all this was fields.'

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"I'm a pragmatist, Leon. Before I put a new product on the market, I ask myself, 'Will it sell?' "

Home Sweet Second Home.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

Igloo sales

'They're playing house.'

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

House hunting is cruel.

Repossessions

Unfortunately my weight is like the stock market. In the short run it goes up and down, but over the long term in keeps reaching new heights.

Dog Realtor

'Floodplain close - House on stilts with ladder. Estate Agent saying, 'Welcome onto the property ladder...''

Affordable housing - Mum and Dads.

Estate Agent - 'They're all mine.'

Sadder and Wiser Investment Co.

"For sale £470,000 house included"

"You've heard of the bank that likes to say 'yes' well we're the bank that likes to laugh in your face unless you've got an 80% deposit."

'I'm sorry, but without a significant deposit, we can't give you a mortgage.'

"So, how's that 'Tiny House living' working for you so far?"

"This article says that the number of elderly living with their children is rising..."

"We need to find more stable housing."

Today's dream house is nothing if not a fantasy.

Real Estate Crispy Flakes: Location/Location/ Location

Estate Agent: Houses with Hedge....Houses Without Hedge

Estate Agents.

"It's got a great view!"

'With so many children, I can't afford to live in a choo anymore.'