Promotional Paradox Lovers Gifts

'Applicant wacked out, suggest immediate promotion.'

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

"The central digital platform is temporarily renamed Project Schrödinger’s Cat. Until it is accessed on the 24th February it both is and is not a working system."

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

'It began as The Great American Novel...but it finally sold as an infomercial.'

The Meaning of Life

'You're not fooling anybody but yourself.'

'The last thing he said was 'I'm going to go look up the work 'Dictionary' in the dictionary,' and then the universe kind of collapsed around him,'

European Thinkers (2): 'Surf's up!'

Grenadiers

Right Against Right.

"Carl had the mouth of a truck driver... Sorry, Carl, I just can't make no sense from all those words comin’ out your pie hole. A truck driver with a Ph.D. in mathematical logic."

Man overloaded with samples

"We have ways of making you say yes, but I want you to want to say yes."

Zeno Gives Directions

The new normal.

Moses with the Ten Commandments on a Ski Lift

Woman says treadmill reminds her of her life.

'The doctor told me to get away for a while..Where I live, in the country, it's just too quiet for me, so I've come here for a vacation.'

'Say that again and you're a dead man!'

The City that Never Sleeps.

National Paradox Foundation: We're closed come in.

'I know one never knows, but I don't know how one knows that.'

Fastest slowest animal

Smoking in the Paradise.

'Making these snacks low-fat was great because substituting sweetener for fat made them even more addictive.'

'National Public Television now presents 'Monday Night Chess'!'

'I'm afraid you're a hypochondriac Mr Jenkins... but luckily we have a pill for that!'

"I want you to enhance long term growth while maximising short term profit. Oh, and while you're at it, turn this chunk of lead into gold."