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The Magic Float

Great Chinese Dynasties

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Use your imagination.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

Madame Rejane- Famous French Actress in the Part of Madame Sans Gene

Giant Monster in Bath

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

"Now this I get."

"Got any bathtub gin?"

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Pray for me.'

'It's not easy painting hummingbirds.'

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

First we thought the apes would conquer the world...When in reality we've been busy mining the end of the world all along.

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

Art Gallery.

"Caricatures $20"

"...and yet it doesn't quite capture his thoughtful, contemplative side."

EU: Behind the scenes.

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore

"He's an abstract artist."

Egyptian Football

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

Art of Surviving

Goddess of Fertility garden feature