Art Collectors T-Shirts

"This painting, we're sorry to say, is pure trash."

"Trophy husbands."

"Caricatures $20"

"What do you do for a living?"

"I think what I was TRYING to say with this piece was that I wanted a new car. . ."

Great Chinese Dynasties

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

Paul Klee

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Use your imagination.

Children's artwork exhibition.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

Wagging Dog

"Needs to get a life"

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

Madame Rejane- Famous French Actress in the Part of Madame Sans Gene

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

Giant Monster in Bath

Slinky Cow World

"One!...Two!...Now spread those tail feathers..."

"It's an Eyesaur."

A Footnote - Self Portrait of Beardsley, Bound to the God of Nature

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

Cock A Doodle

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

Creation of Red Wine

"Now this I get."

"Got any bathtub gin?"

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Pray for me.'