Profit Skeptics Pillows

'My work is based on a version of the truth, but I believe the truth to be fluid...'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

"He's not a big fan of micromanaging."

'So, a bailout is like a Ponzi scheme for automakers?'

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

"I can't understand it, we did quite well in the first three quarters.

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

Progress?

'I have great job security since management doesn't even know I work here.'

BP Greed Credentials - huge profits and cuts to environmental promises.

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

The private sector is a parasite on the economy.

Hey boss, that generic soap you gave me isn't really cleaning the cups. Mind if I go get some brand name stuff? Are you insane? There's zero difference between generic and brand name products. Corporate America just cons people into thinking "you get what you pay for." Don't be a stooge, Rudy. Don't fall for it. Now get in there and scrub those cups, minion! Strike a blow for the little guy against corporate lies! Wait ... I'm very confused. Are you a right-winger or a left-winger? You mean in w

'Stocks dropped today, proving once again that life sucks.'

'Thank goodness we don't need profits in order to make piles of money.'

Be thankful we didn't invest social security funds in the stock market.

Guide to Working Class Investing

"I invested $1000 in Nortel and now my shares are worth 18 cents."

'I need a small, temporary tax hike - I found a great investment opportunity in Nigeria.'

'This bottle stainless steel cleaner...if it's stainless...why would you need a cleaner?'

"You know it almost BEGGARS belief that so many people are unwilling to pay for professional pension advice."

'Rumors...'

Home improvements do not always represent a sound investment.

"This is our newest drug. It's currently undergoing rigorous testing to see how much we can charge."

'Maybe so, sir, but our motto is, 'A penny saved is a lot of trouble for nothing.''

'Well, I'm AGAINST adding a course in business methods to the curriculum....

'Before sending these ideas I have to the boss, run them past legal, my Ouija board and my magic 8 ball.'

Victims of Financial Consultant's

Get rich today with cold fusion tomorrow! Invest now!: 'More like con - fusion! He's a con artist!'

'Yeah, I couldn't make a lousy cent for days and I don't care about it! Got me, dude?'