Profit Paradox Ponders Gifts

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."

'Looks like the perfect time to bring in our profit sharing scheme.'

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

'One thing is certain. It's not just a seasonal slump.'

"I can't understand it, we did quite well in the first three quarters.

"'Statistics will prove anything' is right, Carruthers. They prove you screwed up."

'Walk softly and carry a large credit line.'

"What kind of tomorrow is it? — I don't know, when I wake up, it's already today."

"Well, we know it's WAY down there, but it may be beyond the range of our equipment."

'Frankly, I'm a little concerned.'

'I'm sure you all agree that this has been a very constructive meeting.'

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

'Our profit dropped because half of our salesmen are in 'How to increase the profit' - training, sir.'

'My work is based on a version of the truth, but I believe the truth to be fluid...'

'Thank goodness we don't need profits in order to make piles of money.'

Since this is a smoke-free building, we'll have to fool the shareholders with mirrors alone.

"He only wears it this time of the year. It's his har-vest."

'Children are all right, Carson, except they're so damned unprofitable.'

"And this is where we introduced our new customer care policy."

You've got to hand it to George..he NEVER lets a sale go without a fight.

'Go crunch these numbers again. They're a little hard to swallow.'

'Hang on, have we got this right?'

'After two days of intensive calculations I have figures out why your company doesn't make any profit: your expenses are too high. That'll be 4, 785,000 euros, please.'

"We managed to make ends meet."

'The good news is, profits are up 74%, the bad news is, we don't know why.'

"O.K., who can put a price on love? Jim?"

Sales at the Yo-Yo Co.