Profile Picture Critic Gifts

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

'Do me a favor and don't let my dog see my license photo.'

This picture of me in the annual report...do you think it really captures the true inner corporate man?

'He's picture perfect, alright, but the negative leaves a little to be desired.'

"If I'm coming across as shallow, uncaring and egocentric, talk to my image manager."

'It's just more pro-parent spin.'

Using a social media app to date

Critics In Love

"But sir, you may think you want underwear, but your internet consumer profile says you want a jet ski."

"Your mother was young and restless and knew what she wanted. She wanted out."

"This can't even be the right planet! No one looks remotely like their online profile pics."

'You've got her on 16.5 zoom and it's not good.'

Francis Bacon

Red Letter Days - Having one's portrait shown

'A dog learns about the flyer that was used to find him.'

"So what's the next landmark we can build for people's dating app profile pictures?"

This will be an awesome profile pic!

'It looks nothing like me!'

"I kept hoping the picture would get old and repulsive looking, instead of me, but it didn't work out that way."

"Do you recall how my eHarmony profile said I love to hike? Well, I lied."

"He looked a lot bigger online."

Quentin de la Tour

"Gee, you didn't mention your wart in your personal."

The creation of the first size OO woman.

"Do you want style or comfort?"

Mulroney's portrait made it clear he'd not forgiven his Conservative detractors.

'Don't make my nose too big!'

"That's an unusual, orange jumpsuit!"