Professional Slacker Gifts

You're not a team player, Peters - and I think we can all agree that's a good thing. Beer.

"It took years of hard work to get my colleagues to expect nothing from me."

"Joey...I need you spending more time helping customers."

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

'Jenkins, about these coffee breaks of yours...'

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

The Sedentary Dead.

Boss With Whistle.

Intermediate Slouching.

"Won't your boss miss you?"

Under zealous: ZZZZZZ!

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

"Actually, turns out my entire life can take place at 10%."

"What are we doing today?"

Why are you texting instead of working?

Man in office watching TV instead of a computer monitor.

'I'm on a great career path that never leaves my apartment.'

"Wow! Nice job on that display, Baldo! Just don't tell the boss. He'll make you do more."

'Some guys wait awhile before showing their true colors. I appreciate you not wasting any time.'

"Stop doggin' it!"

'I'm running late again this morning...' - '...in the vain hope that somebody will fire me.' - 'Gah. My life is ridiculous.'

Could I have a minute of your valuable time, Parker?

'You wanted to see me when I woke up?'

'I know but I have to consider him irreplaceable until I figure out what he does around here.'

He had an accident at work-an idea struck him.

'You know sooner or later they'll notice you've replaced your monitor with a portable TV.'

'Out to Hunch.'

"I wouldn't say he was a creature of habit - more of a creature with bad habits."

While you were in

"You're a disaster Jones, you've only been here a week and you're already a month behind with work."

"What is the first item on the to do list?"