Prison Narrative Fans T-Shirts

'It was a woman. . .I was snitched by a pigeonette.'

"I was doing ok before the investigation

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

Prisoner decorating his cell.

'Before you go to prison, Sims, I'd like to give you this award as 'Scapegoat of the Year'.'

'It's windy this morning.'

Preferred Prisons

'I guess it all started the day my mom said, son, if you put your mind to it, there's nothing you can't do.'

'I'm getting into a rut -- campaign, election, indictment, parole... campaign, election, indictment, parole....'

"No ham in this, I hope?"

A prison with a conservatory attached.

Guys in torture chamber: 'TGIF!' and 'Shaddup.'

'Well, I'd best be off, Arthur, the clink of glasses behind bars and all that...'

"I had everyone fooled. Could have got away with it, too, if he had just kept his big mouth shut."

Prison ain't so bad- ? -aside from all the metrosexual activity.

'It must have been quite a mid-life crisis if they gave you 30 years for it.'

"I got eight to twelve years, which was in line with Wall Street expectations."

"I was making big money! Yes, an inch too big."

'Of course you can't remember what you had for breakfast -- we didn't HAVE any breakfast.'

'Tell you what - you've really caught the sun to-day.'

"He says he won't wear a mask."

'I got busted for Identity Theft: I was pretending to be the Prince...'

"Refusal to Obey a Police Officer. You?"

Prisoner playing golf with his ball and chains.

'When I first saw you on TV, I just knew you were innocent of stalking.'

'Yes, you look stunning. Can I put the mirror down now?'

'Look on the bright side, think of all the money you saved by conducting your own defence.'

'Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already suspect.'

Prison decorating

Do you believe in free love?

"It's hard to believe you've served 14 years already for armed robbery. I lose all track of time when I'm shopping."