Prison Documentary Aficionado T-Shirts

"Will there be time to stop at the gift shop?"

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

'Yes, Frank, yes. That's how my body will fall when you kill me, and your laughter will echo down the corridors...'

"Surely it can't be twenty-five years already!"

Preferred Prisons

"No ham in this, I hope?"

"Escape Thursday? But that's Bar-B-Qued pork night!"

Prisoner on the run - tread mill.

"In the movie about the New York prison escapees, I'd like to see Jack Nicholson as Richard Matt and Woody Harrelson as David Sweat."

'Here comes the warden. Let's see you try to dance your way out of this one.'

'I'm a celebrity now...so get me out of here!'

'The warden said, no...you may not call in an interior decorator.'

'Sure, you can escape, but you never escape unscathed.'

'Thanks, but I don't need a lawyer. I'm going to tell the truth.'

"Long story short, twenty minutes ago I wuz foolin' around on the prison computer... pressed the 'escape' key, and here I am!"

Barnaby in Newgate

'Of course you can't remember what you had for breakfast -- we didn't HAVE any breakfast.'

'Let's stay in tonight.'

'Yeah? Well you could use some deodorant, too!'

Prisoner playing golf with his ball and chains.

"It's hard to believe you've served 14 years already for armed robbery. I lose all track of time when I'm shopping."

"It's like home from home in here. The rules and regulations are very similar."

WARDEN, 'You're a bad influence around here, Murdock!'

'What do you mean, the food is terrific?'

''I'm under house arrest for six months. It's a lot more fun if you're not already in jail for a bunch of other crimes.'

Lawyer to prisoner- It's stopped raining, I'll be going,

Prison officers' hospital visit.

'How's my appeal going?', 'How's your tunnel going?'