Primal Poet Gifts

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

"The invention of taxidermy."

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"I think your going to need a business plan."

The invention of the wheel and the axel.

Love birds: 'How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.'

Mammoth Posing

"Hey ChatGPT, compose an eloquent and poetic courtship monologue."

Early House Hunting.

'He lifted two! That beats your world record yesterday of one.'

'Ye gods, Will - art thou still monkeying about with that Ooh-ooh language?'

'Look, fire is fire - Why try to develop theories about it?'

'This 'wheel' thing of yours - does it have to be round or will any shape do?'

Caveman Valentine,

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

"I wish I had his I.Q.!"

"We've finished the hunting and gathering. Let's invent the vacation!"

Toolmaking was always a challenge during the Plasticine Era.

"Something I ate disagreed with me." "What did you eat?" "Ibuku. He disagreed with me."

'Ever since this 'evolution' thing started, I've been doing a lot of soul-searching.'

Man walking and farting.

"THREE quid for a romantic verse? Don't you have any snappy one liners for 50p.?"

Homerphobia

A woman writers love letters while the angel collects the hearts.

"You reckon Winterbottom is still in the clutches of that impossible female?"

Nikloay Mihaylovich Karamzin.

'He gets credit for inventing language, but he was just belching.'

"You keep that up, and eventually the earth will be too warm

'And best of all, it kills germs that cause bad breath!'

"They say he knows 37 ways to kill a man with a rock."

'Does it have any military applications?'

"Well, Gorg, looks like you've taken your invention to the next level."

"So, smartypants, what's this gonna do to our carbon footprint?"