Price-conscious Drinkers Gifts

"Mister, I don't know if the glass is half full or half empty. It's 12 dollars."

Sale.

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

Gym. Check in Here. The only time I feel the burn is when I pay the memberbship fee.

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

"Blowing the whistle is perfect for a sports bar to let its patrons know that Happy Hour is over."

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

Crisis Buzz.

'At least someone can afford to travel by train.'

'When I first saw here I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, but not with beer at these prices!'

'Ridiculously Expensive Coffee.'

'We let our products speak for themselves. This is ‘I Can't Believe It's So Tasty And Price-Friendly In Today's Demanding Market.' '

Doctor's profits match a patient's scar.

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

6-7pm: 'Money can't buy happiness' hour.

'Well, you did insist that our travel agent find the cheapest tickets to Hawaii.'

'No doubt about it, THIS is the most beautiful time of the day!'

'Jim gets a powerful charge from electric cars but always gets burned by the sticker shock.'

"The great is $54.99, and I do have a near-great for $23.99."

Avocado Prices

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

January Sales

'This pill you take twice a day before meals. . . this pill you take right after I tell you what those pills cost.'

Pharmacy. These days a miracle drug is one that I can afford.

"I can't afford probiotics . . . How much amateurbiotics?"

"Health insurance? Waking up breathing each morning is my health insurance!"

Purified Water. Look at these prices! Distilled waters run steep!

I have to tell you: I preferred "buy one, get one free" night. Tuesday is "tall bartender, short bar stool" night.

"With the economy the way it is, I thought I'd start a garden. One million vegetables shoudl be enough."

'How is it health food prices always make me feel sick as a parrot?'

'All I can say is, if you like trying new beers and hate having money, this is the one for you.'

"I prefer the cheap stuff."

'I love this RX site - I can look up prices for all of my unaffordable medicine around town!'

"Overpriced to astronomical, sir."