Prescription Cycle Explorer T-Shirts

'I'm going to take you off 8 medications and put you on 9 new ones.'

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

Emoticon Encouragement Therapy

Psychiatry. I got in touch with my inner child, and now I'm going broke buying video games!

'Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?'

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

"How much is this going to cost me?"

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

Man in a tortoise shell visiting a psychiatrist.

'Look at the bright side -- having a business fail when you're thirty is great preparation for your Midlife Crisis.'

"Apparently you're a bi-polar bear."

"You have to remember you're not responsible for other people's happiness."

"I know it seems cruel, but it's the only way for him to get rid of that silly technophobia."

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

"Whatever doesn't kill me gives me the chance to try new prescriptions."

"Too much caution can take all the fun out of life." "Mind if I get a second opinion?"

Tell me about the voices in your head, Al. On the one hand, they tell me to do horrible things. On the other hand, they sing the sweetest harmonies since the Mills Brothers.

"There's only so much bat-mansplaining a girl can take."

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

Medicare: More is Better!

'The pain in my head always seems to subside when I flush your bills down the toilet!'

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

'I suffer from depression too Ms Frost. Sometimes I'm not even motivated to get out of bed!'

"My lifestyle is empty and meaningless."

"Feeling a bit under the weather again, Mr Robinson?"

Sadie, we need to see a couple's counselor. Yuck. No way! I won't spend a bunch of dough to have some halfwit tell me how to live my life! But I found an inexpensive counselor who will just listen to us talk through our issues. Counseling $10. This end up.

"It's true. Your mother is a great oak, but she, too, used to be a little nut."

Tomb with a knight and his psychiatrist.

"I never discuss my clients with their mothers."

'Mrs. Tomkins says her prescription has no side effects, so it can't be doing her any good.'

'I can see you're going to be a bit of a challenge.'

'Only one side effect - colossal pain...'