Prehistoric Novelty Seeker Gifts

Stone-age Patents

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The first car accident.

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

The discovery of asparagus.

Those Were The Days

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

"Daddy's working from home today."

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

"The invention of taxidermy."

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

"I like it but does it get only the one channel?"

The First Kite

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

"Say, Honey, how about a nice salad for supper instead?"

"I'd like you to see an Anthropologist.''

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

Reinventing the Wheel

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

'Dear, couldn't you spend part of your time actually hunting something?'

Sober Tooth Tiger

"...One careful owner, not much mileage. In fact, I only invented it last week."

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

"According to your resume, you've done nothing of any real significance since inventing the wheel."

Good luck with that quest for fire thing! I'm just going over there to eat some grass!

"Oh, this? It can access every piece of knowledge from the history of mankind and I hate it."

"Dad, tell us a scary meteorite story."