Prehistoric Comedians Gifts

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

As the world emerges from the last ice age Ug & Og discuss a historic agreement to reduce CO2 emissions from woolly mammoth barbecues.

'You realize, of course, there's a seven-day waiting period.'

Early on-line shopping

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

'You can't believe a word he says since he invented the subjunctive.'

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

Carbon Dating

"Why T-Rexes do not play volleyball..."

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

'We had seven gloriously happy years together, and then he learned how to talk.'

"I like the idea, but is it scaleable?"

'Yea, I give away the fire. I make my money on insurance.'

'I wish we'd never invented talking — nagging was so much easier to take in sign language.'

"Crap. I overslept."

Geekasaurus.

'I made your favorite -- dinosaurkraut!'

'Finally - an alternative source of energy!'

'Don't believe everything you read.'

The first unfriendly takeover