Pregnancy Philosopher Pillows

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, just as long as I'm healthy."

"Amazing. For the fifth consecutive month the polling shows I'm the most popular foetus here."

Cry babies.

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

'ooh! A womb with a view.'

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

A little bird told me...