Predator Ponderer T-Shirts

"Since I retired, I've been doing some part-time consulting for a younger predators' group."

"I love the part when they scream, 'Hey! That's no log!'..."

Astronaut on tether sees circling shark slicing through the surrounding space.

Human meat.

Walking on Water

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

Wildlife

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Why bother?"

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

'Thanks, we really appreciate this. Yeah, the middle button. Don't worry, it's auto-focus - just aim and shoot.'

"Go ahead. Fly through it. I dare you."

But there are other pleasures still for the fisherman's delight....for nature is everywhere about him.

Business Duck

"This blood knot ought to be re-named the blood, sweat and tears knot."

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

Bees v Wasps

'You can fill your teddy bear with stuffing or with a demonic spirit summoned from the nether regions.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

'When we bought this place we thought we'd only be making wine. Apparently, we're also into spirits.'

"I can't wait to start growing limbs so that I can use a tablet..."

'I know it's hard to believe. But biological speaking, they're our closest relatives.'

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)

'My horoscope said I was going to make someone happy today.'

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

"Ok, you were right – dogs can see ghosts."

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

Six frogs leap off their lily pads.