Prayerful Poet Gifts

"We've always admired those literate prayers of yours, and it's our hope that you'll keep them coming even though you're dead."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

Drive-thru Church

"Amen. Please help me up."

Praying mantis.

'The only way anyone gets in is on there knees.'

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

'I have a math test tomorrow, Sir, and I could use a godsend multiplicationwise.'

Various Birds of Pray.

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

"And please let Alan Greenspan accept the things he cannot change, give him the courage to change the things he can and the wisdom to know the difference."

'This is the Rabbi's favourite.'

"I'm going to have to make this quick, God. I just ask that you watch over me during my double knee replacement tomorrow."

"... and God bless my mom and her courage to call this food."

Holy phone

And cut down on the praying if you want the housemaid's knee to go...

"Are we allowed to pray?"

Put it in writing!

"The Lord has heard your prayers and has sent me to say unto you, shut up about it already."

'Last guy up blow out the candles.'

Trilby - 'May heaven go with her!'

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."

"Sometimes, God deserves a standing ovation."

"I'm not sure if this is getting through and I don't know what time you finish for the day...."

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

'...and if my taxes are cut, I promise to stimulate the economy.'

Exercise for the end of the day...

"Dear God, what's the meaning of knife."

'I didn't realize my mom thought so much of our school. . . she's been thanking God for it everyday lately.'

'Mr. Turtle is interested in 'Single Prayer Health Insurance'...'