Prayer Group Leader Gifts

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

Grace For Flies

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

A child interrupting family prayers

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

"Coronavirus, masks requirements, falling test scores, student violence - we need to be able to pray in school!"

Monk Prompt

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

Praying mantis.

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

"This might take awhile, Lord."

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

Saying Grace.

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

'This is the one - we want you to pray for this one.'

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

"What do I click on after I say 'Amen'?"

'Let's see,,, You're answering prayers until 9:30,, Your Armageddon meeting's been pushed to 2:00 and it looks like your speaking engagement in Mrs, Ingersol's head is postponed 'til Thursday,'

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

"...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education..."

'I'm about to say my prayers, Dad. Do you want more pocket money too?'

And cut down on the praying if you want the housemaid's knee to go...

Holy phone

"If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

'God Bless Momma, and Daddy and Fluffy...'

After finishing his 5 minute guitar riff, John realized the silence was due to his filling in on the traditional service worship team that particular Sunday morning.

"You don't have to worry about using up your minutes."

'This is the Rabbi's favourite.'