Prayer Advocate Gifts

Grace For Flies

Women Preachers? Gay relationships? Let's pray for guidance.

"Coronavirus, masks requirements, falling test scores, student violence - we need to be able to pray in school!"

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"Bible lessons are best taught in the context of faith. There's no need to add 'based on a true story.'"

Monk Prompt

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

Praying mantis.

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

Saying Grace.

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

'This is the one - we want you to pray for this one.'

'Let's see,,, You're answering prayers until 9:30,, Your Armageddon meeting's been pushed to 2:00 and it looks like your speaking engagement in Mrs, Ingersol's head is postponed 'til Thursday,'

"You don't have to worry about using up your minutes."

Holy phone

'You've got plenty of time for a little prayer before you get to him.'

And cut down on the praying if you want the housemaid's knee to go...

"...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education..."

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

'I'm about to say my prayers, Dad. Do you want more pocket money too?'

'God Bless Momma, and Daddy and Fluffy...'

'This is the Rabbi's favourite.'

"If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."