Pr Buff Pillows

"Obviously, because he had the best P.R. people he was the most famous reindeer of all."

"As a concerned corporation, we take very seriously our responsibility to offer banal and meaningless platitudes for social media consumption."

"You're fired."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"National security adviser"

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

If nobody had invented graphics

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

US v.s. Tech Giants

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

Sue the Author 3PM

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

'Have you no common scents?!'

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

Stephen Fry

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

Planet of the Lawyers

Moses Today. Due to the sensitive nature of this matter, my source wishes to remain anonymous.

"Please don't watch this show! There's a viewer trigger warning and a short fuse alert."

'John is watching the game under protest.'

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

Some scents are nonsense.

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

"No officer, I didn't what the speed limit was. Those signs were going by too fast."

'Floppo' lottery rebranding

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

Lady to man in netted car: 'Stinkin' speed trap.'

"Permission To Treat Prosecutor as Hostile, Your Honor?"

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."