Posture Perfectionists Gifts

Sign against skateboarding, sign against slouching.

'Your forehead and your neck are now only two inches apart.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

Yoga for Alcoholics

That may well be how the catalk models do it, but I still think you look like a three legged horse in a field of cowpats!

'I know one of my shoulders is lower than the other. It's because my father's guiding hand is always on that shoulder.'

"Could you keep still?"

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

"We need to create more hashtag-worthy moments."

"You need to stand up for yourself, or at least sit up straight."

Surreal ale

Office Ergonomics.

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

'You've spelt 'C.V.' wrongly.'

Man looking at watch while a cuckoo comes out of his head

You're right-this is way better than a standing desk.

"It's just a hunch, but you spend a lot time at your computer, don't you?"

'Am I the first one here?'

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

Making it look easy.

Lessons from the Blakely Art School (Now Defunct)

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

Is it a book? A film? A TV show? How do you mime a podcast?

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

Besties Photo

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

"Stop staring"

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

Santa's Out Tray.

"This painting will make you so famous that you won't be able to walk down the street without being recognised."

'I don't want to be a shepherd. I want to be the policeman who interrupts the play to tell all the mummys and daddys who have parked irresponsibly and dangerously outside to move their cars...'

'Excellent. But try it again and this time start your sway at the beginning of the fourth bar, O.K.?'

Quality Contorl.

It turns out people aren't buying our product because it's stupid.

No Skateboard. No Slouching.