Poolside Philosophers Gifts

Divers Lap Pool

Is the pool open today? What? No, we're a cafe, not the YMCA. Oh. I guess I can't exercise today. I'll have ice cream instead. you gotta admire the pretense.

Human paddle

'We need to drain the pool.'

"I have to quit the swim team. My braces rusted."

"Nation-building never works."

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

Academics At The Beach: The Old Man And The Sea

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

A Poem about Sand

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"It ain't easy, Doc. There's a lot of pier pressure."

'How's the water, dear?'

One of Many California Gene Pools

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

'...the really big ones can be found.'

How Relaxing It Is To Go To The Beach. . . How Close You Live To The Beach.

"We're not on vacation anymore. The company folded."

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

'Perhaps we should leave details of the divorce settlement until after we are married.'

"She thought he was a good listener. Turns out he was a decoy."

Mozart on a lilo

'Wow, swimming IS great exercise! The bathroom scale I put down here shows I'm 20 pounds lighter!'

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

"It's nice to see John finally relaxing."

How swimmers look and feel after a long swim.

"Don't be afraid of sharks. They generally attack only when provoked."

"IBM up 2 1/4, ATT down a 1/4,GM ... "

As the years passed, Grandpa became more absent minded...

'Despite anosmia she fonded her penuche.'

Lemmings on Vacation