Poolside Counters Gifts

An abacus swimming pool

"I love my new tie! I'll wear it to work tomorrow." "The report'll be done shortly." "Excellent!"

'Mom! -- Spot's skinny-dipping again!'

'C'mon Ben, there's no need to count them out!'

'Don't you think your Jim has taken getting his favourite sun lounger as far as it can go?'

The Clueless Diver

Man and Woman suck in their stomachs in order to impress.

'Honey, you can't keep running to Daddy every time you find a little bug or something in your pool!'

"Really? Not much of a challenge here."

'I got one this small.'

"So what's on the agenda today? Let's see--nap, then count my spots, then nap again, then chase my tale, nap yet again, then beg for good, nap, scratch at the door, finally come in and find a spot to go to sleep. Just not enough time in the day."

Entry level astronomer...

'How did our ‘Get Away From It All' vacation turn into a ‘Take Most Of It With You' long weekend?'

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

Blonde woman talking to airport bookshop assistant, 'I'll be spending a lot of time by the pool - do you have anything in pink that would match my bikini?'

"Shake! Good dog."

'Of course I'm worried. I heard that the legs are the first things to go.'

'I thought you could count cards.' - 'I did count them. There were 52 in each deck.'

' I thought we had six fish in the livewell.'

'...Where did you get all these piranhas?'

'Just stay on this track in a counter-clock-wise direction for, oh, I'd say another two or three laps. Can't miss it.'

"The real torture is not being able to get my steps in."

Baldo and Cruz try to look good as women in bikinis walk by."

Runner's Deja Vu

"No peeing in pool"

'Yes dear, everything here at work is going well. Can I call you back, I have something, I mean, someone on the other line.'

Flip Flops

"Hey, you doing the backstroke, you've forgotten some thing!"

"It's nice having the option to work from home."

'You'll be okay, buddy. Quick! How many legs am I holding up?'

"The only time a fisherman tells the truth is when he calls another fisherman a liar!"

"Hey, you. No diving!"

Roberta had a unique way of keeping track of the days she'd been in the raft.

'Okay, Jimmy, you've been in there way too long now...'