Pool Party Pooper Pillows

'I like the litter box...but the pool has gotta go !'

Bring your own inflatable.

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

The Perfect Cannonball

"Mom! Dad! Do something!"

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

Happy New Year! Hope you can stay up for it!

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

Conga train chasing a man at a party.

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

"If global warming is a left wing plot... it's a very good one."

"I know it's only been a little while since we've been allowed to mingle again but I'm already getting really tired of people."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"I'm passing on Halloween parties this year. You just know everyone's going to show up as Martha Stewart."

'You've had enough!'

'I hate the new vicar's cheese and wine parties.'

"Right now, I'm between naps."

'Not that sort of pool party.'

'I hope you'll excuse the pajamas. They save time when people leave.'

Swordfishes Playing 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'

'Your wife didn't do this. I'd recognize your handwriting anywhere.'

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'Okay, Jimmy, you're been in there way too long now...'

Baldo's Life is Sweet Moment: When your new best friends down the street install a swimming pool.

Shark in the swimming pool.

"Dude, you gotta get out here and clean this pool more often."

'So I guess it's New Year!'

"Man, this party's boring... do you think we oughta add a laugh track?"

"Yes Spooner, I said 'pool party'."

'Remember, kids never over inflate your water wings.'

"Not a chance."

"Let's be realistic. Are we all going to try to keep this party afloat, or should we just go home and forget it?"

'I hate these things. They're always so formal.'