Pool Party Pooper Gifts

'I like the litter box...but the pool has gotta go !'

Bring your own inflatable.

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

The Perfect Cannonball

'I made them during the blizzard in January. Whad'ya say we go liven up my sister's pool party?'

"Mom! Dad! Do something!"

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

Happy New Year! Hope you can stay up for it!

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

Conga train chasing a man at a party.

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

"I know it's only been a little while since we've been allowed to mingle again but I'm already getting really tired of people."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"If global warming is a left wing plot... it's a very good one."

"I'm passing on Halloween parties this year. You just know everyone's going to show up as Martha Stewart."

'I hate the new vicar's cheese and wine parties.'

'You've had enough!'

Another great new year's eve! We're not doing anything, Ames. That's what's so good about it. The Dixons asked us over for a Quaker new year. They pop the bottles at 9 p.m. I guess

"Right now, I'm between naps."

'Not that sort of pool party.'

Swordfishes Playing 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'

"Man, this party's boring... do you think we oughta add a laugh track?"

'Your wife didn't do this. I'd recognize your handwriting anywhere.'

"Yes Spooner, I said 'pool party'."

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"Dude, you gotta get out here and clean this pool more often."

Baldo's Life is Sweet Moment: When your new best friends down the street install a swimming pool.

'Remember, kids never over inflate your water wings.'

'I hope you'll excuse the pajamas. They save time when people leave.'

Shark in the swimming pool.

'Okay, Jimmy, you're been in there way too long now...'

'So I guess it's New Year!'

"Let's be realistic. Are we all going to try to keep this party afloat, or should we just go home and forget it?"

"Not a chance."