Pomp And Circumstance Fan Pillows

Offended Dignity

"Oh come on! It's not the first time I've done that procedure!"

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

Cupid misses his shot.

Office supplies - Notebooks, memo pads and rap sheets.

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

To keep cool in the summer, Victor installed a whole-house flan.

The Perils of Dog Kisses

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

"This one is really unusual. We have to remove a horseshoe from a guy's naval."

Fortunately, his training had prepared him to deal with all types of customers.

'Satchel, I have a hunch...'

"This coin must be 2,000 years old. Try not to put this one in a pop machine."

Sir Isaac Newton discovers even more gravity.

"Father Michael has a wicked sense of humour."

'I don't think much of the punchline.'

A cheerleader doing a high kick

Snowmen

Moby Dick: Pop-Up Version

"The secret to being a cat is to imagine that Hail to the Chief is playing wherever you go."

Naval Command 'Innie' and 'Outie'.

"You'll have to excuse your father. He's a victim of a deepfake campaign."

"So the SM is for swedish massage?"

'One shot of this and you won't know a thing. Too late. He doesn't know a thing now.'

Finger Food.

"What's up? Never heard of e-snail before?"

'It was sort of like a penalty for early withdrawal. The bank hadn't opened yet.'

Man on desert island asks for a lighter rather than a rescue.

Dish and spoons, "She always goes off with the dishy ones"

'I tried fresh water once... talk about bland!'

Bottle shock